To say this year has seemed so long is an understatement. Many things happened that sent me in a downward spiral through part of it and felt like my life at one point was going to come to an end.
If you find it hard to read these kinds of blogs then I am not offended if you do not wish to read on I just like to talk about it to make people see that those who have felt like this too, aren't alone and you can come out of it, because facing your depression can be a lot harder than it being inside you, because that annoying voice that speaks to you, makes you feel that often there is no way out.
I was a total mess at the start of this year and very suicidal and was talking to people from my passed who were having a nightmare themselves. A few people who I knew from Peabody and from my present life had gone for good, as they were brutally attacked too. I broke my heart a lot.
There will always be times where you feel life is going to get worse and worse and it can be so soul destroying when there are many people who you thought loved you, but they didn't at all and that can really hit you like a knife.
I kept going though and thanks to people whom I had come to admire over the years on TV got in contact with me and have now helped me to get out of that hell hole and carry on doing what I love, being a writer and now doing it as a fulltime career.
Thankfully if all goes well, there are even better things on the horizon coming soon which I will let you know about as they arrive.
Those people including my new love Lee, helped me to stay strong and come alive again.
There is always light at the end of the tunnel and you can get out of a depressive state it just takes time.
Denise Welch has written a book about depression which is called the Unwelcomed Visitor and spotting the triggers and signs of depression. It can be caused by many things and can be a build up to you not wanting to be seen, heard or near anyone.
This book is available from Amazon now if you wish to purchase it via this link:
Denise Welch The Unwelcomed Visitor
There is a lady who we all knew as Caroline Flack who took her life and it was so sad as she seemed to embrace who she was and what she did. I thought she was such a ray of sunshine and a total shame that someone so lovely and seemed happy, would be found dead and ended her life.
Sadly there are people who want to see someone take their life and they aren't worth the shit they were born with. Sorry if this is harsh but noone, noone should ever destroy someone so much that they want want to commit suicide, but there are.
If you need support and help them there is a brilliant organisation called Mind.org that can provide support and help, I do also have a related site to this one called Everyone Can Build A Castle or you can contact me via the comment section below and I will be happy to listen, as often that is all we want.
Many thanks for reading,
Carrie X
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